Hindi Shayari

Hanju tere niklen te aakh meri rove ,
dil tera hove te dhadkan meri hove ,
khuda kare saadi yarri inne gurre hove ke ,
saah tere ruken te MAUT anjan di hove !!

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Muskurahat tumhi se milti hai,
Dard ki raahat tumhi se milti hai,
Ruthna kabi mat hamse E Dost,
Hame jeene ki chahat tum hi se milti hai

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1. On being Late:
“Kab shuru hua?”
“Attendance ho gayi kya??”
“Kal raat der tak gappe marte rahe yaar”
“Mein kya karu, wo bathroom mein ghusa hua tha”
“Aab nind nahi khuli to mein kya karu. . bolna . kal kya padaya tha sir ne”
“Kal se pakka class karunga”
“Ek page de na. abe pen bhi to de”
“Yaar iss class ke liye koi subah kaise aa sakta hai.”
2. During the lecture:
“Yesss !!!! SirThe answer is huuuummmmm. ..aaaaaaaa. ..”
“No sirI know the answer sir.. ..”
“Saala apne aapko Newton samajta hai”
“Abe lecture ko chod dekh wo kya lag rahi hai aaj.”
“Uske bagal mein nahi baith sakta thagadha. ..”
“Kya bore ho raha hai. Bola tha movie dekhne chalte hain ”
“Heads, we go Movie , Tails, we go Movie now!!!”
“class khatam hote hi Soft drink chahiye .”
3. Lab
“Expt. 2 Kiya kya??”
“Isme Karna kya hai??”
“Yeh bhaimereko aata to tere pass kyon aata. ”
“Are tu to bura maan gaya dikha na”
4. Tests
“Tests???? Aree yaar.. ”
“Kya.. abe Test mein itna topic hai to annual mein kya hoga..”
“Boss hogaya.. aur nahi ho sakta .jaan nahi de sakta ”
“Oh !!! Itna syllabus cover ho gaya ?”
“Aaj kounsa test hai?”
“Oye Mera dost kaha hai..uska roll number mere baad haiwo nahi aaya to mein pakka fail..”
After test..
“yaar pada tha..recall nahi kar payachhod na Canteen chalega.”
5. For attendance (less attendance isliye attendance badane ke liye bahane)
“I was in the class, lecturer mark karna bhool gaya ”
“Oye usko thoda khus kar list se tera naam hata dega. ”
“Bola tha proxy regularly maar Saale teri class karne ka kya faida hua”
6. Late submission of Projects
“Maine usko bola thaa ki copy karke mera assignment bhi saath mein submit kar dena”
“Last date extend hui thi”
“I didn’t know the last date”
“Ab mein kya karu usne mereko bole bina hi submit kar diya”
“They should allow XEROX .”
7 . After exam
“Yeh bhi syllabus mein thaa kya?”
“Achha !!! ye aise hota hai kya?”
“Ye Kaunsi book me tha”
“1st mein 3 marks2nd mein 03rd mein 2Gaya. fail pakka ”
“Yaar notice lagte hi faad dena. wo kya soochegi mera marks dekh kar..”
8 VIVA (b4 exam)
“Submission ab tak hua nahi hai , VIVA kya ghanta doonga”
“Aeee..Rohit. ..terese kya poocha.. .”
“External ke ghar mein bacche nahi hai kya”
“Dekh Boss!! external bhi aadmi hai. Usko pata hai students ki ab tak preparation nahi hui hai”
9 . VIVA (General)
“Dekh , tu jo bhi padhega , woh (external) tereko woh nahi poochhnewaala, then watz the point”
“Roll no. 1 aur 2 ki watt laga di hai”
“External is asking Bermuda Triangle ka Magnetic force kitna hai”
“Ye kounse unit mein aata hai”
10 . Submission
“Ye bhi chhapna hai kya?”
“Iska bhi print-out lena hai kya?”
“Jai ho computer baba ki..jai ho Ctrl C – Ctrl V ki”
“Tujhe Sir ka sign aata hai kya?”
“Ye tune kya likha hai????”
(The best one)
“Jo word samajh mein aa raha hai woh likh, jo nahi samajh mein aa raha hai uski drawing nikal”
“Phir bhi, kuch to idea hoga??”
” Maine uska likha hai, mera assignment check ho gaya , tu bhi wohi kar.”
“Koi hint. ”
“Are baba ghasit de.na tu samjega na wo.”
12. Exam
“Jo (mujhe) aata hai, woh (paper mein)aata nahi hai; jo nahi aata hai who aata hai”
“ye question 2 saal se nahi poochha hai”
“ye last time hi poochha thaa”
“tere paas is ke notes hai??”
“woh chapter. mark weightage 6 marks. (facial ex-pressions speaks the story)”
“nahi samjha to rat le”
“External ke aane ke pura scene hai ”
“Iss paper mein roll number ka kya order hai.”
“Pichle paper mein to kuch to aata thaissmein to anda aata hai..”
“Ek aur din ka gap de dete to kya 3rd World War ho jata tha kya.”
. bas ek bar wapas lautne ka man karta hai
. Aaj har wo baat yaad aati hai
. kuch buri batein jo ab acchi lagti hain .
. kuch batein jo kal ki hi batein lagti hain .
. abki baar class attend karne ka man karta hai .
. Dopahar ki class mein aakhen band karne ka man karta hai..
. hostel ke chat ki wo raat yaad aati hai .
. exam ke time pe wo hasi mazak bahut pyari lagti hai .
. tab ki bekar lagne wali photo’s chehre pe hasi laati hai
. Apni galtiyon pe tumse daat khana yaad aata hai. .
. Par tumhari galti dekhne ka man karta hai.
. Aaj tum bahut yaad aate ho
.fir waise hi subah uthne ka man karta hai.
.bas ek bar wapas lautne ka man karta hai.
.bas ek bar aur
.wapas lautne ka man karta hai

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Arj kiya hai
Mera har ek sher tere jazbat se achcha hoga,
Mera har ek din meri raat se achcha hoga,
Niklegi jab doli tumhari, niklegi tab arthi meri,
par mera janaza teri baraat se achcha hoga,
Mere janaze ke peeche mat aana , tumhe taqleef hogi,
Kyuonki main char kandhon pe rahoonga aur tu paidal hogi

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